Fatherhood is one of the most significant experiences in a man's life, second only to completing GTAV. But let's face it, it can be a harrowing journey. These men have managed to score small, albeit humiliating, victories. 

Joseph Turner, 43-year-old father of three: "I slipped into Sainsbury's for bread while the family waited in the car and treated myself to a Krispy Kreme donut. Realizing they could see me through the glass and a war would erupt, I headed to the toilet to enjoy it in peace, ignoring the curious looks and the aroma of strangers' urine."

Oliver O’Connor, 39-year-old father of two: "Every Sunday, I endure standing on a freezing field cheering my son in his under-sevens football game. But for the past two months, I've secretly listened to a gangster podcast during matches. Nobody knows I've made the ordeal slightly more bearable!"

Jack Browne, 32-year-old father of two: "Realizing my bathroom breaks were the best part of my day, I pretended to have IBS. After ten months of stomach clutching, I now get 15 uninterrupted minutes in the bathroom. Though my wife nags me to cut out gluten."

James Bates, 47-year-old father of two: "I encourage my wife to have a monthly girls' night. Once she's gone, I have the kids in bed quickly and spend the evening on the sofa watching any action movie Netflix offers. Is she having an affair? I couldn't care less."

Will McKay, 32-year-old father of one: "I’m supposedly part of a pub quiz team, but I sit alone, enjoying the bliss of no one screaming for wipes or watching Waffle the Wonder Dog. I even bought a trophy to avoid suspicion."

Wayne Hayes, 53-year-old father of four: "Recently, I 'sorted out' the garage by napping on cardboard boxes under a tarpaulin for four hours. It was a blissful homeless experience I can't wait to repeat, but now we have to go to a National Trust event that will cost a hundred pounds."